“It’s easy to get down on ourselves. We may not like our hair. Or our nose. Or our height. [Or my weight – I added this part].
But one of the most important truths of this life is understanding who we are—a literal son or daughter of God. He created us. He loves us. He thinks we are beautiful and wonderful and capable of great things. With the help of His Son, we can be “crowned . . . with glory and honour” (Psalms 8:5) and return to God’s presence, where “all that [the] Father hath shall be given unto [us]” (Doctrine and Covenants 84:33–38).”
Author Unknown, Mormon Ad, The New Era, September 1988
We need to remember, I need to remember, that society’s perspective on how we should look is not what Heavenly Father’s perspective is. He sees us for who we are, not what we look like.
I find myself falling into that trap quite often though. I want to appear capable and confident.
Since I was diagnosed, I saw myself go from being able to do anything I wanted (not that I wanted to do everything), to someone who has to use both hands to hold onto a cup of water, or hold onto a railing or wall when I walk so as not to fall. That was, this new way of life is, a humbling experience for me. My confidence has taken a dive. I’m still struggling with that part of the disease the most…the mental part.
Am I still stubborn sometimes? Oh yeah… just ask Lori. But I’m working on putting my stubbornness to worthy things.
So, I can’t do what I used to be able to. So what? I CAN still do many things. I need to focus on what I can do. Control what I can control. Do I miss not being able to do many things? Sure I do. But I will again one day. That’s a hope I hold on to.
For now, I need to put my efforts into the important things in life. I need to strengthen my foundation, and I’m not talking my legs, although that, too, needs to be stronger. I need to gain knowledge, temporal and spiritual. I need to deepen my relationships and associations. I need to appreciate what I have because, one day, it may be gone. I need to forget myself.
Harder done than said though. Afterall, I was excited for the chance to go through this before I even came here. Now I’m getting the chance to go through it. I can’t let pre-mortal me down!!